Meraki

YOU ARE NOT ALONE

My new line coming out this spring is about growth. Last year we walked together. I shared my story with you and in return I got to meet so many of you and hear your stories. Together we saw the beauty in the cracks.

Sharing my story with you when I released Brave was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. Being so publicly vulnerable terrified my inner introvert haha. But I think it is important to know that what we see on Instagram is just a small fraction of a person. I don’t ever want to come across as someone who has it all together, because I don’t. Some of my hardest days were when I thought I was alone in my struggle. But I wasn’t alone, and you’re not alone.

I WANT TO SEE YOU BLOOM!

How do we grow? And where do we start?

With a strong foundation of course. I want to see you build on a foundation of truth. I want you to step outside your comfort zone! I want us to grow together. I want to see you BLOOM!

I look around outside and see all the flowers starting to bloom. No two are the same. They grow wild and free, each one telling their own story. I love picking flowers. My husband has had to stop the car on more than one occasion while I spontaneously run around a random field trying to find the best flowers to take home with me! I love the ones that have personality. Their stems twirl wildly towards the sun. I envy their freedom.

"…but what you couldn't always see were the vines that were slowly strangling the trees…"

Growing up in Australia I saw so much beauty everyday. I would often explore rainforests and observe the trees that just seemed to go on for miles. Sometimes the vines would wrap around the trees creating beautiful textures and patterns. But what you couldn’t see was that the vines were actually strangling the trees. As the vines slowly wrapped around the tree like a python, the tree became less and less visible. Eventually the vines would consume the tree and the tree inside would die, leaving only the vines standing strong in the shape of a tree. As kids, we would find gaps between the vines and crawl inside what once had been a tree, then we’d climb to the top from the inside.

How similar are the lies we let in. They start out small and slowly creep in, wrapping around us. Growing bigger and stronger, strangling us slowly over time until we can’t grow anymore. Until only a shell of who we were remains.

These lies can quickly become our foundation. Sometimes they are started by others. Passive aggressive comments, manipulative words, subtle reminders that you always fail. But then we start to tell ourselves the same lies. We begin to see this lie everywhere we look and it eventually becomes our truth.

We carry shame and guilt that doesn’t belong on our shoulders. Our eyes study others and see how they navigate life with such beauty and bravery and we fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to someone we only get small glimpses of. We think our brokenness needs to remain hidden and begin to play a character of perfection. The art of being what others need us to be becomes second nature. We smile and say everything is okay, but is it really? Are you really okay? We play this person for so long we forget how to be transparent with others and honest with ourselves.

but when the fire is put out, new life can grow…

Another thing I saw a lot of growing up in Australia were bush fires. In school, we often watched as ash would fall from the sky from the local controlled sugar cane fires. We called it “cane rain” and would collect the ash and draw pictures with it on the pavement.

I also saw fires that would destroy land, homes, even towns. Fires can be devastating. They can rage a war against the land. They burn hot and move fast. Fires take and destroy everything they touch. But when the fire is put out, and the ash settles, new life can start to grow.

Normally it takes a long time for vegetation to decay sufficiently enough to release its nutrients into the soil, sometimes decades, but a fire can accelerate this process. During wildfires the nutrients from the destroyed trees quickly return to the soil. Pests and diseases are killed off. Plants begin to grow, and thrive like never before. The forest returns to its foundation and gets to start again.

A fresh start…

Sometimes in life you find yourself back at the forest floor and it can feel like the end. I had watched a fire rage hot and take everything. But what I couldn’t see yet was the opportunity to grow like never before.

With all obstacles gone, I could finally see past all the lies. I started to realize this whole time I had actually been lost in the forest. Its foundation was weak, the soil was depleted. The vines had taken over when I wasn’t looking.

But then I found myself with a beautiful opportunity to start again. To confront these lies and build a strong foundation. To root myself in truth and build a life on that. To work hard, to grow and to one day bloom. To find that freedom and grow wildly towards the sky!

THE TRUTH STARTS NOW…

Sometimes you have to hear the truth 10,000 times before you can finally believe it. What lies have you been telling yourself? Take a moment to correct them. Write down the beautiful truths about yourself that you find hardest to believe. The truths you maybe still don’t believe.

Here are a few truths that I wrote down:

(1) I have value. I don’t have to be what everyone else wants me to be. Who I am today, right now, is okay.

(2) It’s okay to fail. It’s okay to make mistakes. It’s okay to cry and show emotion. Don’t expect perfection from yourself, you are not perfect. And that is okay.

(3) Standing up for yourself isn’t selfish. Boundaries are healthy. Saying no isn’t weakness.

(4) I am not who they say I am. I am who He says I am.

(5) I am loved. I have value.

The forest is long gone. But so are the lies. I spent 3 years in the ash. Healing. Soaking in the truth. Laying a foundation of truth. But now it is time to grow. It’s finally time to let the flowers creep through this new foundation I’ve been building. It’s time to bloom like never before!